Sight of Mind
by whiskeynights
Summary: Castle and Beckett investigate a brutal death at Chelsea Piers that will leave its mark on both of their lives forever. Set mid season 5 and goes AU from there.
1. Chapter 1

Rick Castle was awoken from his deep slumber by an incessant ringing by his ear. He knew who would be on the other end. No one else would ever call him at 4 in the morning, except maybe his mother looking for a sober cab at bar time should she have struck out. But still, that was rare.

"Morning Beckett," he chimed.

"Get up, we have a fresh one," Beckett informed him curtly while he threw his legs over the side of his bed to start his day.

"Sometimes I think you call me just to hear the sound of my voice," he sang back to her as he went about his closet getting dressed.

"No, that's you."

"Riiiiight, because I call you all of the time," he snarked.

"You called me last night to ask me what you should name the homeless guy in Nikki Heat! He is a homeless guy, who cares?! I certainly didn't need to hear about it at 2 am."

"Are you saying I used Timothy as an excuse to talk to you?!" Castle asked with feigned outrage.

"Yes, that is exactly what I am saying."

"Timothy is offended."

"You know, we have been in this relationship for 6 months you don't need an excuse like Timothy to call me," she stated softly, "Who names a homeless guy Timothy, anyways?" she scoffed back at him.

"Me."

"Clearly," Beckett paned, "Well we have a murder at Chelsea Piers. I'll be there in 10 so you better be there in 15. No excuses."

"Well someone's bossy this morning," Castle muttered as he pulled on his pants and began to button up his shirt before he continued, "Should've stayed over, I could've cheered you up," he paused, "So, Chelsea Piers, huh? Someone take a 2 iron to the shins?"

"I've been spending too much time there as it is and while that would certainly be painful, that is not an effective means of death, babe. I'll see you there and please for the love of God bring me my coffee," she finished before hanging up.

Castle went about finishing up getting ready and leaving his mother and Alexis a note before grabbing his coat and scarf before waltzing out his front door. When he walked out into the brisk March air he shucked in a deep breath and began walking up the block to the Starbucks two corners up from his place to get his and Beckett's morning caffeine fix. Coffees in hand, Castle was barely able to flag down a taxi but managed to get a cabby's attention. Castle noticed he was running behind Beckett's 15-minute stipulation and offered the cabby extra in his haste.

Castle arrived merely 5 minutes past due, but of course Beckett took notice as she snatched her coffee from his outstretched hand.

"Took your time gussying up this morning did you?"

"Had to. Couldn't very well show up at a crime scene at 4:25 in the morning looking like I just woke up, could I? Did I get the eyeliner, right? Oooh! How're my cheeks? I gave them a good pinch, wanted to have a good rosy color today," he cheekily returned.

"You shouldn't have gone through all of that trouble Castle."

"Oh? And why is that?"

"I could always just make you blush," she smirked as she playfully grabbed his ass and strutted away towards Lanie with an extra sway of her hips.

Castle did indeed blush as he appreciated the view before taking a swig of his coffee and rushing off to join her at the scene.

"What've we got Lanie?"

Beckett asked as she knelt next to the M.E. at the foot of the victim. The body was sprawled out in the middle of the driving range. His head was bashed in and the rest of him clearly didn't fare much better as he was laid out at an awkward angle.

"Meet Marcus Terrance, 23, a ball boy here at the Golf Club and a victim of a blunt force trauma to the head as well as multiple contusions and abrasions to the rest of his body, which I can tell you more about when I get him on the table. Prelims show that the time of death anywhere from 12 – 2 this morning," Lanie reported while getting to her feet.

"Murder weapon?" Beckett asked following her friend.

"Not here," Esposito put in.

"Any speculation on what it was?" Castle requested.

"Well, based on what I have seen so far, I would say all of the victim's wounds were caused by the same item and that the item was no wider than 4 inches and no taller than 3. Definitely a club of some kind, given today's setting I would speculate that it was a golf club," Lanie said as she gave Castle a glance. He was now wearing his notorious shit-eating grin, "That is all I can tell you for now, but I will be able to give you a more definitive answer on that after the autopsy."

"Alright, thanks Lanie. Let us know when you find something," Beckett replied as Lanie walked off back to the M.E.'s van, the CSU techs delivering the body behind her.

"What did I tell you about the 2 iron?!" Castle exclaimed to Beckett.

"That he took it to his shins, but clearly he took it to his face, Oh Observant One," she shot back.

Castle muttered something about being mostly right but she ignored him turning to the boys and asking for the full run through. They revealed that Marcus Terrance was 23 years old and a recent college graduate who was originally from Newark. Moved to the city to attend NYU at 18. He worked at the Golf Club as a ball boy and as a bartender at a pub in Midtown starting that same year he started NYU. There were no witnesses to the crime as the range was closed at the time. The security guard discovered the body at 4 while doing his hourly perimeter checks for trespassers – usually just the local hooligans as the guard put it. The guard never heard or saw anything all night but after finding the body he checked all of the entrances and noticed the door to the bag room, which was previously locked, had been opened.

"O-kay," Beckett drawled out, "how did the security guard not notice anything earlier? If Terrance was killed between 12 and 2 but not discovered until 4 that means the security guard would have made at least 4 of those hourly perimeter checks and not have noticed a thing."

"Well I'm sure it was considerably darker than it is now when he made the checks. Also, he was killed in the center of the range so if the guard was checking the perimeter he may have been too far away to notice," Castle reasoned.

"Yeah, but the pier is narrower than most and the guard had to have had a flashlight. It just seems too fortunate for the body to have laid this long here while a guard walked by every hour to check things out," she argued before turning to Ryan, "Ryan go interview the security guard again and find out why exactly he never discovered the body until 4."

"On it," he called back while he whisked off to find the guard.

"Espo, coordinate with blues and canvas the neighborhood to see if anyone saw anything. Maybe a pedestrian remembered our vic entering the Golf Club. Castle and I will interview next of kin," Beckett ordered.

"Got it, boss."

"You think the guard was paid off?" Castle asked while they made their way to Beckett's cruiser.

"A second ago you were defending him, now you think he was bribed?" Beckett teased.

"I was merely trying to suggest a reasonable explanation, but I agree with you it is way too unlikely for the guard to not have noticed anything."

"Since when do you offer reasonable explanations?" she snorted.

"Maybe you're just rubbing off on me," he suggested.

"Maybe," she hummed, as she openly looked him up and down.

Castle merely leered back as they both got in the cruiser and sped off to the precinct. They were both finding it very hard to focus on anything but the various ways in which she rubs off on him.


	2. Chapter 2

**AN: I am so beyond thrilled at the response to the first chapter! This is my first fanfiction story ever so it is awesome to see the response. I am also totally unfamiliar with police procedure so bear with me here. Please continue reading and enjoy this next installment!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Castle.**

* * *

They arrived back at the precinct around 5:15. Beckett strutted to her desk to call in Marcus's next of kin and Castle went off into the break room to conjure up coffees for the both of them. Marcus's next of kin turned out to be his mother, Anita, who still lived in Newark meaning they would have to send uniforms to deliver the news and bring her in. Beckett called up Marcus's phone records and financials while Castle was making his way back. Beckett purposefully brushed their fingers while she gratefully accepted the coffee and they both dove into the financials waiting for Anita to arrive.

Two hours later, Anita had come and gone and Castle and Beckett had gained little information from her interview. They merely found out Terrance was an only child who took his parents' divorce hard at age 12. Their home was split up when his father moved out and across the country, which upset Terrance. He was an ambitious young man who paid his own way through school. His father had offered but Terrance refused. His mother speculated it was because Marcus felt abandoned even after all these years. When asked how Terrance paid for his education, she responded that she paid for the first semester but beyond that he had to take out many student loans. Not unusual. When asked if anyone would want to harm him they got the typical mother's response of, "no one would hurt my baby." Suspicious activity? None.

Espo and Ryan had yet to return so Castle and Beckett went back into his financials. Beckett also called the boys to update them on the interview and to have them swing by Terrance's apartment and comb it through for evidence.

While sifting through Marcus's financials they noticed large deposits into his account, all cash so it was untraceable. There were a total of four of the mysterious deposits all for $50,000. The other suspicious thing about his financials was that he never took out any student loans like his mother had claimed.

"Where the hell did all of this money come from?" Beckett exasperated to Castle.

"Illegal activity? It's all cash so that is certainly suspicious. Drug dealer? Gambler?"

"Hmm. Maybe. If there is evidence of drugs at his apartment maybe he is a local dealer and that is how he paid for school."

"Right and he didn't want his mother to know of his illegal activities and told her he took out student loans instead."

She paused before responding, "I'm not seeing it."

"No? Why not? It's plausible."

"Yes, but given the large amount of the deposits and the fact there was only one every year makes me want to say he was definitely not a drug dealer. Typically they sell their load, give the supplier their cut and walk away with their cash. It's never more than a few grand at a time and the deposits are exactly $50,000 each time, too systematic to be drug activity."

"Okay… so let's think, where would someone get $50,000 annually in cash?"

Castle and Beckett both pondered over this question until Castle suddenly exclaimed, "Mob money!"

"Care to explain how you got onto that thread of thought, Castle?" she asked as she swiveled in her seat and turned her attention on him preparing herself for his theory.

"Think about it. Chelsea Piers is known to have a few mobster golf members; the movies have even picked up on that. Imagine a young Marcus who had just started is chatting it up with one of the members and they start having a friendly conversation. Marcus explains that he goes to NYU but isn't sure he can graduate because he doesn't have the money to stick around. Marcus is probably just trying to get a little sympathy from the guy to get a good tip, but what Marcus doesn't expect is for the guy to offer him a loan.

The guy offers him $50,000 a year until he graduates; no payments needed until after graduation. Marcus is skeptical at first, but the member explains he works at a bank (a mob bank with mob money, but Marcus doesn't know that) and it is all starting to sound very legitimate. Marcus agrees because what starving student doesn't want all that money and not have to pay it off quite yet? He was considering getting a student loan anyways.

Marcus gets his money and the member keeps tabs on him at the golf club. But then graduation came around and Marcus has to start paying. Marcus doesn't realize the interest rate that came with the loan meant that he has to pay back double what he got, after all the mob needs to make a return on their investment. Marcus is able to make his payments for the first several months until this fateful winter where he just has no money left. He is burnt out. The member asks to meet him here last night at midnight to re-evaluate the interest rate. Marcus goes willingly, uses his key on the bag room door to get in, and waits for his company to arrive.

They come and they chat their way to the middle of the range when one of the member's lackeys start to beat him around with an iron. Marcus calls out, says he's sorry but he doesn't have the money and he won't until he can find a stable job and save up. The member gets upset, tells him the deal was payments start after graduation and don't stop. Marcus begs forgiveness but the member knows a lost investment when he sees one," Castle gives a dramatic pause and trails off, "He gives his lackey a nod and turns away as the thug tees up for one last blow to Marcus's head."

"Wow," she said mouth agape.

"I know, right? Totally what happened!"

She quickly recovered and corrected, "More like, 'wow, that was way too logical and realistic to have come from Richard Castle's mouth.'"

His gaze on her turned sinister, "That's not the only thing I can make c –"

Beckett leapt out of her chair hissing at him to shut up and firmly smothered his mouth with her hand before interrupting " –Richard Castle don't you dare finish that sentence!"

Once satisfied he would remain quite and reassuring herself Gates was in her office she withdrew her hand, but not before giving his lips an affectionate brush of her thumb.

"I walked right into that one," she reflected, amused, propping her hip against her desk to gaze at the murder board they had set up earlier.

Rick joined her, half sitting on the edge of her desk as they examined their case's details on the board their shoulders brushing. They were running through what they had so far when Ryan and Esposito returned from their vic's apartment.

Beckett stood up to greet them at their desks and barked, "What did you find?" while Castle followed behind her.

"Well, the security guard initially claimed he had checked every hour on the hour for a perimeter check like his job requires him to, but when I returned to tell him the body had been there for four of his perimeter checks and asked why he hadn't noticed it earlier he changed his story and said he missed his checks from 12 until 4 and begged me not to tell his boss," Ryan described.

"Why'd he miss those checks?" countered Castle.

"I asked that very question and he started sweating and acting all nervous. It took a lot of cajoling but I got him to confess that a member had paid him $500 to stay in the office from midnight to 4 am. The member was a Jack Venozzo and didn't let on as to why he would ask the guard to skip the checks and the guard never asked."

"Jack has got to be our killer or our connection to the killer," Beckett claimed and continued, "What else you got?"

"Uniforms talked to a homeless guy in the area, a Tim Sanders–"

"–Wait!," Castle inserted, "Did you say they talked to a homeless guy named Tim?" he asked with child-like glee.

"Uhhhh yeah? His name is Tim Sanders but he goes by Sandy," Espo reluctantly answered, perplexed by Castle's reaction.

Castle turned to Beckett with a permanent smile on his face, "You don't say," he drawled out.

"Okay, apparently one other person besides you would name a homeless guy Tim, but in her defense she would have had no idea he would end up homeless!" she conceded.

He just kept on smiling. Point proven.

She rolled her eyes and turned her attention back on Espo, gesturing to him to continue with what he found.

"Well anyways, Sandy said he noticed four really tough-looking guys being let into the bag room by our vic. He is with a sketch artist now but we don't think he got a very good look."

"On to the victim's apartment, his roommates noticed nothing strange with Marcus except that they had no idea where he got all of his money from. He always had lots of cash on him which they thought was weird but they always just passed it off as tip money from his jobs," Ryan jumped in.

"We seized his laptop and other personal items and found the business card for a Jack Venozzo of Manhattan Trust and that our vic had annual iCal meetings with Jack scheduled on his computer," Espo finished.

"Okay, we gotta bring Jack in for questioning. Get me everything you can on Venozzo. Particularly, look for mob ties. Terrance was getting $50,000 annually in cash and I would be willing to bet that those deposits match with his meetings with Mr. Venozzo," Beckett commanded as Beckett's desk phone began to ring.

She stalked off to her phone and noticed Castle was still grinning like an idiot. Of course he was, the boys had proven him right. Twice.

"Beckett," she answered.

"Hey girl, I have finished the autopsy and am ready for you and writer boy to come on down so I can give you the results," Lanie voiced.

"Got it. We'll be right down," Beckett said before she hung up.

Beckett waited a moment to gather herself so she could handle an over confident Richard Castle. She took another deep breath before taking her giddy writer boy by the arm and off to the elevator.

"Come on Castle, we have a date at the morgue," she told him as the elevator arrived and they hoped in the car.

"Ah," he sighed, "my favorite kind."

The elevator doors slid shut and Beckett took the opportunity to wrap her arms around his neck and bring his mouth down to hers. It was a sweet gentle kiss that quickly escalated when Castle deepened the kiss with a swipe of his tongue. He was clearly trying make the most of the opportunity. Beckett let the kiss last for one more floor before pulling away and straitening out his shirt collar.

"Here is what is going to happen," she led, "I am going to admit you had a good theory and you are going to wipe that ridiculous grin off of your face."

"You want me to quit being all smiley when you just came on to me in the elevator?" he asked dumbfounded.

"Yes," she put it simply.

"This is seriously my lucky day. I get proven right twice, and then you admit that I had a good theory and kissed me at the precinct. How can I not stop smiling?"

"I honestly don't know because it seems that the Universe loves you today, but we're at work and you need to stop grinning like a love-struck fool," she smiled.

"Ahhh but I am one," he breathed.

"I know, but try to hide it a little better, okay?" she asked quietly, "We gotta keep it professional and you giving me that smile makes me want to do more than maul you in the precinct elevator, so tone it down a little at least."

"You got it, babe," he said and smirked when he let loose the pet name.

"Gah! Not at work." She hissed as the doors opened on the correct floor and she stepped out of the car. Castle waited a beat to watch her leave before diligently following her.

* * *

**AN: That's the latest chapter. I have the next two outlined a little but I am still working to tie everything together in a neat little bow for you! The next chapter might be a little shorter, but things will pick back up after that.**

**Please review! Your thoughts are extremely important to me so please let me know what you like and don't like about this story so I can make some improvements!**


	3. Chapter 3

**AN: I have been busy with midterms and lately and then went on vacation for Spring Break, so I apologize for the delay! **

**This chapter is on the short side and not a lot happens for the plot for I am just trying to set up some points for the later chapters.**

**Please review, I want to know what you think!**

Castle and Beckett strode back into the homicide bullpen after their visit with Lanie. They had learned that the killing blow to Terrance's head was the end of his beating, the rest of his injuries were all sustained perimortem in accordance with Castle's theory. Other than that, Lanie merely verified her prelim cause and time of death.

Esposito and Ryan immediately approached looking grim.

"So, we sent unis to pick up Mr. Venozzo, and he is in the wind. His place was turned upside down and it looks like he skipped town. We're trying to trace his whereabouts now and put out a BOLO as well as an APB," Esposito started.

"Furthermore, we looked into Venozzo and discovered he works for Midtown Trust Bank, which has been suspected for funneling mob money. We contacted Major Crimes to see if they had anything on the bank or on Venozzo and said they believe him to be a lowly loan shark in the organization," Ryan added.

"Right, they speculated that he is most likely a new and inexperienced shark trying to establish credibility on the streets. Crime scene like Chelsea Piers definitely got people talking," Espo inserted.

"Also, the sketch artist got back to us after he talked to our homeless guy and it is pretty much nothing. Didn't get a good look at him but described him as an average white guy about 5'10", medium build, brown hair, scruffy looking. He drew up a sketch anyways but with facial features missing, it won't help much," concluded Ryan.

Beckett frowned a bit at the revelation that their main suspect was aloof. "Well we need to get him in here. Did anyone check with Mr. Venozzo's work to see if anyone there knows where he ran off to?" she questioned.

Ryan answered her, "We talked with his supervisor at the bank and he said Jack never mentioned plans to leave town. Didn't call in sick or ask for vacation time or take a personal day, but given the nature of the bank he may be covering for Venozzo."

"Right. Castle and I will go to the Bank to interview his other coworkers to see if they noticed any suspicious activity. An in person visit might spark more of a lead on his whereabouts. You two pull security footage from Venozzo's apartment and traffic cams in the area, see if you can't catch sight of him," Beckett suggested.

While the detectives were calling down to tech to pull the footage, Castle wandered over to the murder board and was looking it over once again. Beckett notices the slight knot on his brow and the frown on his face.

"Cheer up, Castle," she admonished as she waltzed over to his side, "your theory has been proven and like you mentioned earlier, today is your lucky day." She stepped a little closer and lowered her voice to add quietly, "Smile, stud."

He did just that. "I can't not smile when you use a pet name."

"I know. You love it," she cheered.

"I do," he said smugly before turning his attention back to the board and frowned again, "It's just that it seems too easy. I was correct in my first assumption? That never happens. Also, this guy was so very not careful. All of our leads point to him, it'd be impossible to miss it."

"What exactly are you suggesting, Castle?"

"It's too easy. We're missing something," he stated simply.

"That may be, but we won't find out for sure until we bring Venozzo in for questioning."

Castle nodded and fetched her coat off the back of her chair and held it out for her. He helped her into the sleeves and swooped her hair out from under the collar. She smiled in thanks and made her way towards the elevator. He snatched his coat and a granola bar from the top drawer of her desk and caught up with her.

"Here," he said handing her the bar. She gave him a skeptical look to which he added, "we worked through lunch and it's almost dinner time. Eat up."

"Thanks," she said reluctantly as she took the bar and began to unwrap it as the elevator made its way down. The independent part of her hated it when he made sure she ate enough, when he took care of her. She hated that she loved it.

They got into her cruiser and pulled out to head to the bank Venozzo worked at. They sat in a comfortable silence as they weaved in and out of traffic. Castle was busy watching passersby when she was thinking about how amazing their relationship and partnership has been recently.

Things are going so well between them. They had been practically living together considering most of her closet was now in his and she even did her laundry at his loft. She still made a point of spending a few nights apart, just to allow them some time to miss each other. That was why she spent last night at her place and she woke up aching for him. It didn't matter that she had talked to him for nearly two hours about his meaningless homeless character, Timothy, who she was almost certain would never end up in one of his books. She was happy, so unbelievably happy with how things were going.

That was why she panicked a little bit when he asked her to move in last week. Things were going so well, why change it up now? It was for that very reason she hadn't packed up every last one of her possessions and moved in to the loft yet. She just felt they could milk a little more happiness out of the semi-cohabitating mark. She had a feeling she wouldn't feel that way in a week or so though and with that thought she reached across the console and sought out her partner's hand. He glanced down at their joined hands and smiled. Yeah, she would move in with him. And soon.

**AN: There you go! Don't forget to comment! Comments help me develop as a writer and also give me a better sense of direction for the story. Happy Castle Monday!**


	4. Chapter 4

Currently, the bank was getting them nowhere. None of the employees knew where Venozzo was so Castle and Beckett struck out. Luckily, Ryan and Esposito came through and Beckett's phone rang.

"Beckett," she answered.

"We have a Jack Venozzo on tape getting into a white van. The shot is fuzzy, but it looks like he had company with him, possibly the goons that helped him beat on Terrance."

"You get a plate number?" she asked as she and Castle stepped outside of the bank and flipped the call on speaker so Castle could hear.

"Yup. Registered rental car, we called the rental company and they have GPS units in all of their vans and tracked it to a building at 1200 Assembly Road out in Brooklyn near the Navy Yard."

"You think he is still there?" Castle asked her.

"One way to find out," she addressed before telling Ryan and Espo to meet them at the van and hung up.

Castle and Beckett arrived first to the building the rental car company traced the van to. They noted it was an industrial building that was up for rent, meaning a couple of the floors were probably empty waiting for tenants. This whole thing felt fishy to Beckett like Castle had suggested at the precinct.

While waiting for their back-up, Castle and Beckett continued to survey the area when a window was blown out at the top floor. They both jumped into action, flying to the trunk to strap on their vests.

They were about to go in when Beckett grasped Castle's forearm, "Stay behind me, Rick," she urged.

He nodded as Kate withdrew her piece and opened the side door to the stairwell. The main floor was empty as they had suspected and Beckett cleared it quickly before making her way up the stairs. The building was about six stories and was dead silent, giving no indication of any activity.

Castle was following her up the stairs diligently as she rounded the fifth floor when muffled footsteps could be heard above them. Beckett gave Castle her best _stay put_ stare and continued on clearing the stairwell. She had just broached the top when a shot rang out.

The shotgun round pierced the concrete doorway to the main area. Whoever this guy was, he was a terrible shot. Beckett returned fire, using the doorway as cover and Castle came up behind her, covered as well. Another slug pelted the concrete wall. Beckett heard the shell eject and moved forward into the room the second she recognized the sound of their shooter pumping another shell into the barrel.

When she stepped into the room, Beckett immediately recognized the shooter as Venozzo, taking cover behind a structural pillar. While he was focused on reloading, Beckett announced herself and demanded he drop the weapon. She was so focused on Venozzo, she never realized there was another person in the room. However, Castle certainly noticed when the mystery man began advancing on Beckett clutching a golf club in his fists. Castle moved out from his safe perch behind the doorway to approach the guy before he could strike Beckett.

The man wound the club back ready to strike just as she was slapping the cuffs on Venozzo, none the wiser. Castle stalked him from behind and yanked on his arm while he called out, gaining his attackers attention as well as Beckett's alarm. The man whipped his arm out of Castle's grasp and drew back the club to strike. Castle brought his hand up to protect himself, but his attempt was futile. The club struck the side of his head with a resounding crack.

Castle's head immediately swam. Dizziness and nausea took over. He could hear Beckett shouting at the guy and some rustling, but Castle was more concerned with staying awake and keeping his eyes open. His vision blurred at an increasing rate as he slumped to the floor clutching his head.

He was fighting unconsciousness with a vengeance. His head was pulsating. He could hear Kate asking him to stay awake, to look at her, but he couldn't see a damn thing anymore. He brought his hands up to cradle his head and felt the sticky, hot, wet liquid he was sure was his own blood. His focus was gone, he slipped his eyes shut and lost himself to unconsciousness.


	5. Chapter 5

**AN: The last chapter was so short that I decided to bless you all with a quick update. Here is the longest chapter yet! I am not a doctor, nor have I ever broken a bone, so the medical stuff may be off, but I did a lot of research so it should be somewhat accurate.**

**I am excited to hear your reactions to this latest installment for the true plot reveals itself!**

* * *

When Castle next woke, he wasn't sure he was even awake. He heard voices, but they were muffled. Was he drugged? He felt weighted down. Numb. Certainly drugged then. He began to try and open his eyes when he felt someone grasp his hand. Kate. He knew that warm hand that clutched at him.

"Castle?" she whispered as she brushed a hand at his cheek.

"Kate?" he returned with a notable rasp to his voice. He was still trying the pry his eyes open. He knew his lids were moving. Next thing he knew a straw was placed at his lips and Kate was telling him to drink.

He drank a few sips before he began to really process what was happening with him. His eyes were in fact open, but his vision was still blank.

"So, uh, not sure how to say this, but is there a reason I can't see anything?"

She gave his hand a squeeze and ran her thumb gently over his brow. "I'll call the doctor, okay?"

He hummed in agreement and apprehension as she stepped out of the room. He could hear her feet take her further away from him. Doctor? Did that mean they were in the hospital? Now, that he was alone he began to panic. He couldn't see. Why the hell couldn't he see anything?

He heard more feet shuffling back in, and the squeak of tennis shoes that must be a doctor or a nurse. He felt Kate clutch at his hand again with both of hers. He would never be able to verbalize how appreciative he was of the touching. Made him feel like he wasn't alone; reassured him he wasn't dreaming. Although, considering he couldn't see, he would rather this was all a dream.

"Mr. Castle, my name is Dr. Allan Cartwright and I was the neurologist who operated on you and I can answer any questions you might have, but first let me tell you what exactly happened, okay?" Cartwright spoke from his left.

"Sure. Nice to meet you," Rick tentatively spoke.

"Likewise. First off, the left side of your head was struck by a golf club. The head of the club struck you in the back left portion of your skull, or the occipital lobe of your brain. The injury left a skull fracture and caused some bleeding and swelling of the occipital lobe. We performed surgery to stop the bleeds and to try and alleviate the swelling with some success. Detective Beckett tells me you are having trouble with your vision which suggests your brain injury has resulted in cortical blindness. Generally speaking cortical blindness does not result in a complete loss of vision, so tell me, how much can you see? Is it bright in here?"

"Is this a joke?" he asked, starting to get frustrated. He couldn't see a fucking thing and this guy was telling him he should be able to. Prick. Kate must of noticed him getting flustered and squeezed his hand. Hard. He tried to calm himself before answering. "I'm guessing it is bright in here, because I am assuming I am in a hospital and my previous experience tells me the florescent lights are probably white and blinding. No pun intended."

"Right, but what do you see, anything? Do you have any light sensitivity? Can you make out any shapes at all?" he carefully asked.

"Nothing."

"Okay, now I am going to check your pupils and then you can both ask me questions."

Castle felt his eyes being prodded.

"Any change? Can you notice my flashlight? Can you see any change in light at all?"

Castle shook his head. He had nothing. No vision.

"Okay, Mr. Castle. Seems you are one of the few people who have a complete loss of vision after a trauma like this."

"Is it permanent?" he rushed out, begging the doctor for a 'no.'

The doctor hesitated entirely too long for Castle's liking. "Honestly, most likely. If it were an ocular injury, there are options, transplants, treatments, etc. With a brain injury however, there is nothing we can do. If we went back in to repair the damage we would most certainly either make it worse, slightly better or damage something else entirely. Brains are tricky; you cannot go in without consequence. It is possible that once the swelling goes down in about two weeks that you game some sense of vision back, like light sensitivity or shape recognition. You, however, will probably never regain full sight. I am very sorry Mr. Castle."

Rick was fairly certain he was going to have a panic attack. He was fucking blind. Forever. He tried to take several deep breaths but they wouldn't come. He was fairly certain he was crying. Luckily Kate was there.

"Shhh, Rick. It's alright," she soothed. Brushed her lips against his hand, his cheek, his forehead. She wiped his tears away and damn, it worked. He recovered. Her lips moved to his ear as she whispered, "you always wanted a dog anyways."

He barked a laugh at that. He could hear the smile in her voice. Oh, and he could feel it too. He really could. Even if he couldn't see it, at least her smile sounded and felt just as lovely as it always looked.

"So what now?" he asked the doctor shaking himself out of his thoughts. When he didn't answer right away, Rick thought he had snuck out during their moment, but after rustling some papers the doctor answered him.

"Well, first off, you are going to be here for a couple more days to recover from your brain surgery. You're on some medication for the pain, which we are waning down for when you are discharged and given a more home-friendly dosage and prescription. That's the strictly medical side of things. In addition, after you are discharged we will set you up with a physical therapist or you can find your own who specializes in blind therapy. They'll essentially work with you on reading brail, identifying objects, moving around, walking in public, using a white cane, working with a seeing eye dog, among other things. All of the physical stuff. I also highly recommend seeing a psychologist. Becoming suddenly blind is an enormous change to your life and you're going to need an unbiased third party to talk through these changes with."

"Okay. How do I go about setting this all up?" He was overwhelmed with all of the things he was going to have to change in his life. Especially brail. How the hell was he going to write when he couldn't see what he was writing?

Kate stepped in then drawing small circles on the back of his hand with her thumb, "I can arrange everything. I already grabbed your insurance card from your wallet and everything. Just need to schedule stuff."

"Okay." He chose to focus on her touches, her voice, instead of the piling amount complication that had become his life.

"I am going to assume that Detective Beckett here will be staying with you?"

Castle opened his mouth to answer him but Kate had jumped in immediately declaring a resounding, "Yes."

Castle suddenly felt very guilty. Kate would have to take care of him. His whole family would have to take extra care of him until he could better function on his own. God, this was horrible.

"Relax, Castle," she scolded, reading his mind too well for his own good. Clearly, the psychologist was a good idea. He had a lot of issues to work out. He gripped her hand in thanks.

"Detective, I am going to leave you with this folder of all of the contacts you will need to arrange everything," Castle heard more papers moving and assumed this meant he was giving the folder to Kate, "It has information on therapists you can work with, psychologists we recommend for this kind of thing, where you can apply for a seeing eye dog, where you can register Mr. Castle for being blind, etc. It will have everything you and your family will need and will be able to answer any questions you may have in the future. It has my business card in there as well, so you can call me if something comes up down the road."

"Absolutely," assured Kate.

The doctor bid his goodbye and promised to check up on him later. Castle heard some shuffling and the door softly closing.

"We alone now?" he asked.

She hummed and scooted her chair closer. Castle needed her closer though. He scooted to the far left side of his bed to make room for her, separating their hands in the process; his brain giving him soft throbs of challenge even through the medication. He could imagine her adorable pout of protest in his mind. If he didn't nip that soon, he was sure to get a lecture about how he was hurt and he should just stay still.

"Quit pouting Kate and get in the bed."

She scoffed. He so caught her. She moved up into bed with him, her moves hesitant. Eventually she curled herself into his right side, her forehead resting on the healthy side of his skull, hand laid flat on his chest and a leg entwined with his. It felt so nice. He could picture it in his mind. At least he still had his imagination to help him picture things, he was a professional daydreamer after all.

He could hear her breath in his ear and felt it fan over his neck. He was overcome with the need to touch her so he wrapped his arm around her, bringing her flush to his side, hand curling at her shoulder. He turned to face her, foreheads touching, and with his free hand, sought out the nape of her neck. He found the underside of her chin first and tentatively ran his thumb along the skin he found there and along her jaw. He came into contact with a luscious lock of hair and brushed it back behind her ear before cupping the side of her head. He felt something wet when he reached his thumb out to stroke her cheek.

"Don't cry, Kate," he murmured before leaning in to kiss the tears away. He pressed his lips to the tears on her cheeks before their lips met in a soft, meaningful kiss. They kissed languidly for a few moments before Kate pulled back.

"I'm not crying, Rick."

"No? Then why were your cheeks wet?" he queried.

"It's my snot," she insisted on a huff.

He laughed heartily. "You telling me I just kissed your mucus away? On your cheeks? Gross. How does that even happen?"

"You missed, clearly. What you thought was my cheek was really my upper lip. Congratulations you probably just caught a cold," she joked, but it fell flat. He knew she was deflecting.

"No, I may be blind but I still know your face, I committed it to memory a long time ago," he smiled, "C'mon, Kate. I know this is affecting you as well, so please share."

Her breathing hitched as she struggled with her emotions and he went back to softly stroking her cheek as more tears came, "My heart just breaks for you, ya know?" she barely got out on a breath.

"Kate," he breathed, "I do, I do."

He surged forward and met her lips in an all-encompassing kiss before pulling her into his firm embrace. He continued to cradle her head and rub soothing patterns across her back as she sank into him and silently cried. Once she calmed down, Castle held her for a few moments before breaking the silence.

"Are mother and Alexis here?"

"It's 4 am, they're sleeping in the waiting room," she voiced into his chest, running her fingers over his pecs through the hospital gown.

"Why the waiting room? Surely there's enough room in here?"

"There is, but the doctor said you would probably wake up tonight and he thought it was wise to not have many people in the room. Eliminate unknown factors for you."

"Ah."

"Yea."

They lay together for a while before Castle began to nod off.

"Rick?"

"Hmm?"

"Go to sleep. You need your rest. We have a big day tomorrow, lots of visitors and you have to help me pick your therapists."

He grunted softly in reply.

Kate nuzzled his neck before raising up to place a kiss to his lips. She breathed a goodnight and an I love you into his lips before moving to get up. Castle gripped her tightly.

"Don't go," he pleaded. She was his guide right now; he couldn't let her go.

"I'm only going to the bathroom, Rick, I promise I'll be right back," she vowed with a kiss to his forehead and Rick let her go.

He felt the bed shift and heard her feet carry her to the bathroom. Now that he was alone, he noticed how truly dark his world now was. He scrubbed a hand down his face as Kate was returning from the bathroom, the creak of the door giving her away.

"Everything okay?" she quizzed quietly, "Do you need more meds?"

And just like that, the darkness was a bit lighter, less daunting. She was with him. He could get through this, but he needed her to do it. He needed her. Period.

He shook his head in answer. "We're gonna be okay, right?" he asked as she snuggled up to him again, resuming her previous position curled into his side, "We're gonna get though this?"

"Rick," she sighed and soothed his furrowed brow with a gentle thumb, "there isn't anything in this world we can't get through. Together."

"Together," he echoed.

Kate cuddled in closer at his words and pressed a sweet kiss to his neck, he turned his head and pressed a kiss to her hair in return.

"I love you, Kate," he said into the darkness.

She closed her eyes to join him there and squeezed his middle, "Love you, too."

* * *

**AN: I am really anxious to hear what you all think, but rest assured, I want to hear it!**

**Review, Review, Review!**


End file.
